I want to escape…

Yesterday afternoon while the kids were watching tv and I was supposed to be getting tea, I had the urge to go out the door and just keep on walking. Walking and walking. Anywhere, just to leave all this behind.

It hadn’t been a good day anyway. I took Pudding to soft play with some friends, but all he wanted to do was throw balls, usually at other children, really hard. To him, it was just funny but I was so aware of how much he could hurt someone, and paranoid about being the mother of ‘that child’. I was quite relieved when our friends had to leave earlier than planned.

Then in the afternoon I went through the Disability Living Allowance form with someone from the MPS Society. Not the most fun of activities. Other reports and feedback we’ve had try to focus on the positive, listing achievements and celebrating small steps that he has made. For the DLA form however you have to put down the worst of the worst, and filling in page after page of things that he can’t do is bound to leave anyone feeling down. I still had the ability to laugh at some of the questions though – on the mobility side: Q. How long would it take to walk 200m? A. If it’s the direction he wants to go he could run it in 2 minutes, but if he doesn’t feel like it…2 hours.

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